Marriage Guidance: You have to see your husband underneath the cloak of this addiction. Addiction is not who he is but what he has allowed to filter into his heart and mind. You need to pray about his recovery and ask God to give you the strength to get through these hard times in your marriage.
Pornography viewing is an addiction of the heart, mind and soul. It is a symptom of something greater going on within those who view it. Just as drinking is a symptom of alcoholism; viewing porn is a symptom of a sexual, emotional, and psychological issue going on within the mind of the viewer. He needs to figure out “what” the problem is within him (past issues) and tackle it head on through His Creator. Was he sexually abused as a child? Was his mom or dad an alcoholic who didn’t show him any love? Was he emotionally bruised from someone in his past as a child?
We all have issues from our past but we must grow away from these sufferings and learn from them. We can’t keep blaming our failings and weaknesses on our past – that’s not right. Grow up, be responsible and take accountability for your actions. If you have bruises that need healing, then heal them! You know what to do. But just in case you forgot, I will help you out a bit with some marriage guidance. Click on the article at end of marriage column, Pornography Addiction:
Pornography for many is more justified than the physical act and if they get caught looking at it, all they have to say is, "well, at least I didn't have an affair."
So, I say, live by the Spirit (The Spirit is Jesus Christ – Your Savior) and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature. For the sinful nature desires what is contrary to the Spirit. (Galatians 5:16-17)
What are the tools (gifts) from God that a man or woman can use against the power of porn addiction?
No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it. (1 Corinthians 10:13)
How great is the love the Father lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! The reason the world does not know us is that it did not know him. Dear friends, now we are children of God, and what we will be has not yet been made known. But we know that when he appears, we shall be like him, for we shall see him as he is. Everyone who has hope in him purifies himself, just as he is pure. (1 John 3:1)
Jesus Christ will free the man or woman from bondage when he or she believes and trusts God with His life. You can find your way home – Jesus is waiting for you to come follow Him.